We spend our childhood in dependence. We rely on our mother and father for room, board, and food. We depend on them for love, comfort, and consolation—for countless things. As children, this is appropriate.
The problem is that many people grow older without growing up—that is, without becoming independent. They still depend on others to do things for them. They never fully reach maturity, because we must move beyond dependence and become self-reliant.
Once we gain independence, we realize that we cannot change anyone. When we enter into a relationship, we must accept people as they are. People can only change themselves; they cannot be changed by us. If we cannot accept them as they are, then we should not enter into a relationship with them at all.
So the next time you see something around the house that isn’t done, say to yourself: if it’s going to be, it’s up to me. Apply this to your life as a whole. Don’t depend on the priest, the pastor, the rabbi, or the imam to do what is your responsibility. No one is coming to save you—you have to take responsibility for yourself. This is part of growing up.
